OOTP 21: May 29, 2020 – Mets 6, Dodgers 1 – Ok, f*** this

Rick Fucking Porcello outpitched Walker Buehler and the Los Angeles Dodgers made a bunch of odd roster moves Friday, giving me a thrilling recap to post. 

At least if they lose like this in reality, I have funny clips and gifs to post about all the bad things that happened. Instead, I just get to tell you the New York Mets (37-20?!) beat the Dodgers (32-24) 6-1 in today’s fake game. Please tell me in the comments where they played better than in this hellish sim Dustin has created.

I like the roll we’re on,” said the second choice for New York’s manager, Luis Rojas. If another game in this series goes poorly, I’ll just assume we have another sign stealing scandal going on.

Anyway, Buehler sucked. Lasting just 3 1/3 innings, Buehler allowed six runs on 8 hits and 1 walk. Yoenis Cespedes and Wilson Ramos led off the second and third innings, respectively, with home runs, while Ramos and Michael Conforto came up with RBI singles.

Meanwhile Porcello has regained his Cy Young form, or the Dodgers just didn’t give a shit today, as he finished 7 IP with 6 hits and 0 walks. Only two Dodgers struck out against Porcello, but the offense mustered just one run on a seventh-inning sac fly by Joc Pederson. Austin Barnes and Matrix Muncy each had a pair of singles while Corey Seager came up with the only extra base hit, a double.

The real star of the game was the Dodgers bullpen, which threw 4 2/3 scoreless innings after Buehler left. Edubray Ramos struck out three around one hit in his inning and Joe Kelly returned from a shoulder injury to throw one inning, allowing two hits. But the biggest news of the day is Andrew Friedman’s newest acquisition Brandon Kintzler made his Dodgers’ debut with 2 2/3 IP, needing just 26 pitches to do so.

When you can trade for a journeyman 35-year-old right-handed reliever, you just have to do it. The system is sooo weak on pitching of course. Kintzler’s arrival and Kelly’s return meant Adam Kolarek and ROSS STRIPLING were sent to Triple-A Oklahoma City.

Julio Urias gets the start against Michael Wacha, who I completely forgot signed with the Mets, on Saturday. Its truly a shame the Dodgers regret failing to grab Wacha to this day, Bob.

About Cody Bashore

Cody Bashore
Cody Bashore is a lifelong Dodger fan originally from Carpinteria, California (about 80 miles north of Dodger Stadium along the coast). He left California to attend Northern Arizona University in 2011, and has lived in Arizona full-time since he graduated in 2014 with a journalism degree. He currently works for the local newspaper, as well as writes for the university’s athletics department.